https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyl ... a-red-flag
Richard’s colleagues call him their work therapist. He’s empathetic and a good listener, he says – “so a lot of people tell me about their personal shit”, including the people he works with at his retail management job in the south-eastern US. But when they complain to him about their sex lives, or he sees happy couples hand-in-hand in the shop, “I think: ‘That’s not something that’s going to happen for me.’” At 31, Richard is a virgin.
A good listener who's willing to listen to his colleagues' "personal shit"? I think I know why you're still a virgin.
Three years ago Richard was pursued by a woman who retreated after learning, via a game of 20 questions over text, that he was a virgin. “When I kind of pried, she said that she thought that she would ‘ruin’ me.” That response is not uncommon, he says. “It’s like they’re dictating your sexuality for you, in a way – what you are and aren’t ready for, what you can handle emotionally, just based on that one titbit about you.”
If he would just hit up a prostitute and erase his stigma, he could move on to getting the relationship he so craves. Or he could have lied to her, then made some excuse if (when) he prematurely ejaculates. Surely he won't have the same problem for subsequent rounds that night.